YANAKAZMAN

Collecting Hobbies & Stories

The Switch

It was probably Rauf’s second month in school when I saw it with my own eyes. It was after school. He wanted to stay back a little longer to play at the playground. I stood to the side, watching him. Then, out of nowhere, a boy appeared behind him. He picked Rauf up and shoved…

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Finding Thomas Mason

When we left KL, I could already see my parents’ brains working overtime plotting a trip to visit us. True enough, two months after we arrived. It wasn’t exactly a surprise — we’d agreed to meet in London first and then head to NL together. I knew living in Europe would make travelling within the…

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Of Locksmiths, the ER and Ikea

My ears were still ringing when we arrived in the Netherlands. Rauf’s scream at KL airport was still echoing prominently in my eardrum—like an uninvited post encore performance. The moment we left the airport and drove 2.5 hours to Maastricht it occurred to me that this was going to be our home for the next…

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LATEST POSTS

  • The Clean Up

    The Clean Up

    Ever since my grandfather got sick, we started cleaning his room to make sure that nothing gets in his way and to throw whatever that is not needed anymore. Being a lawyer in his mid 80’s, you can imagine the amount of documents and files there were in his room. Every time we were done

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  • The Other Side

    The Other Side

    I’d like to treat the years we live in as friends. Instead of being mad at the year and myself for all the untouched and unfinished resolutions, I would rather thank it instead, reflect on what I have learnt and bid it farewell before we all welcome a new friend called 2019. The happiest moment

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  • Rena

    Rena

    My best friend tagged me in a challenge where you post a picture of yourself from 10 years ago and a current one, along with a message you’d tell your 19 year old self. In the midst of searching for old photos, I stumbled upon a picture of the different savouries Rena cooked for me

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  • Sick

    Sick

    Rauf isn’t even 2 yet and he’s already been admitted to the hospital 3 times, with the latest being diagnosed with Influenza B. Every time he gets ill I torture myself with all the ‘what did I do wrong’ questions. To avoid myself going crazy with the guilt I tell myself all mothers and children

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  • The Coin

    The Coin

    When I was a teenager, my dad and I went somewhere to eat. I dropped a twenty cent coin from my purse but ignored it. He asked me if I was going to pick it up, I foolishly said no and said ‘it doesn’t matter dad, the value is too little for anything’. My dad

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  • PS: I am MOMMY

    PS: I am MOMMY

    Mondays are the worst for me. It’s horrible for most of us but it’s the day I dread  because that’s when I miss Rauf the most. I look forward for work but separating from Rauf after being with 24 hours during the weekend is just dreadful. Rauf grew 3 inches tall in the past 3 months.

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