Kat and I arrived the solemnization area and headed straight for the pelamin.

I looked around and it was beautiful. It was like a scene from a romantic movie. Our family was wearing pink, Joe’s family was in yellow. The fairy lights surrounding the wooden house and the tents were gorgeous. My girls were sitting on the stairs, the boys sat behind them. One thing though, I couldn’t see Joe or my Dad! There was a huge wooden pillar blocking my view and I was silently freaking out because there I was about to get married but can’t see a thing. Oh well.

After everyone settled down, my cousin Hamiz, who was the emcee for the night, introduced the representatives from both families. Our uncles stepped up and said a few words to thank each other for the hospitality. The Imam gave a short khutbah (story, lecture) on the foundation of marriage. He spoke about why Islam encourages marriage and how important it is to love, sacrifice and do good deeds with your loved ones. Joe and I had to sign a document and I can’t remember much on what happened after but I do remember looking over at my girls and admiring their concentration and expression.

Then it was time to get married. My mom  gripped my hand tighter and Kat looked at me with her ‘Okay kak you got this’ face. The Imam asked where I was as he couldn’t see me so I had to walk towards the middle and ‘show’ myself. Then the Tok Imam asked Joe if that’s the lady he’s marrying and everyone laughed. I kind of gave an awkward wave to them because I was like ‘Hello! It’s me! I’m just wearing more make up ya’ll don’t worry!’

I had to sit where I stood so the boys gave me and my mom a chair. I loved sitting there because my girls were surrounding me and I felt stronger having them around. These are the girls that I grew up with. From diapers to kindergarten and school and college. Through all the heartbreaks, good times and bad, I’ve always had them and I had them that night. I felt safe.

My dad and Joe held hands, getting for the declaration and exchange, both looked really calm and ready. I squeezed my mom’s hand a little tighter. Daddy said what he needed to say to pass me over to Joe, Joe accepted. The Imam asked the witnesses if it was clear and all of them nodded.

‘Sah’

and it happened, we were married

I was already tearing up until I saw my cheeky uncles smiling at me. Then Joe had to read at the taklik. The taklik is basically the marital agreement between the husband and wife. the purpose of the taklik is to protect women against men’s discrimination and to put them in equal position with men in all family affairs.When my beloved husband read the divorce procedures (should there be any problems in our marriage), he choked. He kept quiet for a while before continuing reading the agreement.

I understood why he cried. There we were, married for 2 minutes and already reading about divorces. The Imam put his hands together to recite prayers and everyone followed  suit. I looked down at my henna painted hands and prayed to God for his protection and blessings. I felt so thankful to be married to the love of my life, I felt so thankful that my family was around and I felt so thankful that my friends were there with me. I looked around slowly and I saw that my non Muslim bridesmaids also had their hands together and prayed with us. That was one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. We may be different in our beliefs and spirituality but it made me realized that our hearts are one and love conquers all.

 Joe had to perform a short prayer and after he was done, we said hello to each other for the first time as husband and wife. Our friends gave us our rings and we exchanged them on each other’s fingers. I took his hands and kissed them as a symbol of love and respect, he did the same to me. Joe’s parents approached us to give their blessings, his mom kissed me and asked me to take good care of her son. The moment I saw my parents coming I knew I was going to cry. I hugged both of them for the longest time, kissed them and exchanged our ‘love yous’.

After we took pictures in the wooden house, it was time for dinner. My stomach was grumbling and I couldn’t wait to eat! Before we knew it, it was time for the lantern ceremony. It’s not common for Malay weddings to have lanterns but I have always wanted to make my wedding memorable. Joe and I slowly made our move towards the gazebo, our friends were waiting for us, greeting us like angels guarding the heaven’s door. We told them beforehand that we wanted them to be part of the lantern ceremony. Everyone had group themselves and was ready to light up the lantern. Joe and I had to wait for our lantern to burn up until it’s strong enough to float. The wait was so long and I got scared that it won’t fly because there were so many people across the pool watching us. I looked left and right and it was so chaotic. Our friends were also having a hard time lighting up the lanterns and it felt like a zoo at one point. Some were blowing wind into the lantern, some were squatting to make sure that the lantern was properly lit up, the boys were jumping because they thought their lantern was floating but it was a false alarm and it tore. I wish I had my phone and recorded that scene because everyone was being so spontaneous, crazy and loud.

It felt strong enough for our lantern to be released, we let it go and it floated! It actually flew! Alhamdulillah! Ours was the first to float, followed by the rest. It looked so dreamy and beautiful, pink lanterns flying up in the sky together, like moving stars. Everyone cheered and I think that was my favorite moment during the wedding.

We had to cross the bridge to get to the other side and just when I thought I haven’t done anything klutzy, my heels got stuck in between the bridge! But all was good because I had a Cinderella moment when Joe fixed my shoe and put them  back on for me.

The rest of the night was spent by greeting the guests, saying our thank yous and taking pictures with friends and family

 While the boys were taking their photo, I hugged my girls and spent a bit of time with them.

Everything about this wedding was perfect to me. There was drama and many things did not go as planned, but as the bride, you can’t sweat the small stuff. The wedding will only happen once and if you don’t enjoy it, you’re never going to get it back. So to all future brides, cherish the moment. Have fun. Laugh, smile and be yourself.

So that night I went home as a married woman, but I also went home feeling so grateful with everything that God has given me; My husband,  my beautiful parents, my family and my friends. Alhamdulillah.

Here is to our future, our happiness and hardships, our joy and our sorrows, may we always love and take care for each other for the rest of our lives